The Idea: The most cutting edge research clearly shows that empathetic leadership has a significant impact on organizational development and growth.  Most business journals have written extensively on the topic, and it’s even appearing as a core topic in many leadership development and MBA programs.  But wide acceptance of “empathetic leadership” on a surface level is not the same as implementing effective empathy.  Our culture struggles with thinking we understand others, rather than discovering the true motives, aspirations and personal story.  

The winners of the next decade must master talent, customer experience, and the skill of anticipation – all things grounded in empathy. Empathy is the ultimate sales and marketing attribute.  It’s the ability to stand firmly in another’s shoes, feeling what they feel.     As novelist Mohsin Hamid shared, “Empathy is about finding echoes of another person in yourself.”

We need others’ eyes to help us see clearly.  Empathy is grounded in expanding one’s awareness.  Brené Brown, one of the world’s premier leaders on vulnerability and empathy, reminds us, “Empathy is a choice and it is a vulnerable choice because in order to connect with you, I have to connect with something in myself that knows that feeling… What makes something better is connection… empathy fuels connection.

 

She shares in an August 2014 Psychology Today article “empathy is the remedy” and there are four qualities of empathy.  These can be directly applied to all our lives:

  1. To see the world through other’s eyes
  2. Staying away from judgment
  3. Understanding others feelings and emotion
  4. To demonstrate you understand others feelings

Empathy is the ultimate skill of tomorrow’s leaders.  

“Empathy matters,” said Scott Galloway at his recent talk on “Innovative Leadership” at UC Berkeley Haas School of Business. “The most exciting thing about technology, I think, is empathy.  I think there is a direct correlation between broadband speeds and our likelihood to go to war with each other.  China has very little bandwidth; North Korea has no bandwidth.  The less we understand about each other, the more likely we are to make stupid aggressive actions.  People with the same economic system do not declare war on each other.  As soon as countries get more and more bandwidth, they understand us, we understand them, and I think we are less likely to commit acts of violence against each other.”     

Galloway is right. The 2016 Edelman Report on the consumer – brand relationship demonstrates that empathy matters.  Their research states:  

  • 86% people rely on peers to learn about brands
  • 62% won’t buy if brand fails to meet societal obligations
  • 60% say doing good should be part of brands DNA

Relying on your own understanding is a losing proposition.  We don’t see ourselves accurately and most of the times we don’t understand others’ motives and needs.  Our instinct is to believe empathy is soft.  

There is an extraordinary multiplying effect when we demonstrate and practice empathy. It unlocks relationships and creates trust and cohesiveness in organizations.  

The soft skills are hardly soft. They are the foundation. We have the pyramid upside down.